Our Last Eclipse

*Wild Card Post*

I have no inspiration today, so here is a poem I wrote last year.

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When I wake up,

You aren’t there.

Your body whisked away,

Before I could see you.

Your voice echoing in my head,

As I stumble through my day.

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I miss you.

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I miss the hope you always had,

And the smiles you always gave.

I miss the sarcasm I never liked,

And the fear I never saw.

I miss you like the birds miss the trees,

And the polar bears miss the ice.

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I miss you like the sun misses the moon.

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We’re like them,

Living two separate lives

Of night and day.

Always 12 hours apart,

At the other end of the world.

In a long distance relationsip,

Forever chasing,

Until we find each other again.

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We meet in a sorrowful embrace.

Our love for each other overpowering our commong sense.

We overlook all the lies,

All the mistakes,

And all the hatred.

Just to be near each other again.

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But one is always in the shadow.

In a solar eclipse,

The sun outshines the moon,

As does the moon with the sun in a lunar.

They can’t ever be happy together,

Yet when they part,

They spend years searching for each other.

Again, and again, and again.

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Just like us.

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My heart is conflicted.

I miss you more than I want to admit,

But can’t stand your presence.

I love you, but I hate who you are around me.

We always go our separate ways,

And chase each other like

A moth to the flame.

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We run until dawn meets dusk,

Always stuck on the wrong side.

You’re the hate that I love,

And the love that I hate.

One minute I despise you, the next,

I want to spend every waking minute with you.

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I want to follow you until

The world stops spinning.

I want to hold you tightly

Until I feel your arms around me.

I want to laugh at your smile

Until I see it again.

I long for your gentle tone

Until I hear your quiet murmurs.

I cradle your last “goodbye” in my arms

Until you whisper “hello.”

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We never learn.

We’re always the same.

Constantly making the same mistakes

Over, and over, and over again.

I feel like we’re treading water.

Never moving,

Stuck in the same spot,

Barely keeping our heads afloat.

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I don’t know how to end this cycle,

How to stop history from repeating.

How to stop you from coming back,

Or how to stop myself from needing you.

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I can’t keep pretending everything is fine anymore.

Which is why I’m letting you go.

No more “hellos,” or “goodbyes”

Not more “I love you’s”

Or “I hate you’s”

No more chasing, no more eclipses.

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I’m tired of being your moon,

And I’m tired of reflecting your light.

I’ll find another sun.

There are plenty of other galaxies,

Plenty of other stars.

I hope you’ll find another moon

To fall beneath your shadow.

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So with a heavy heart,

I shed my last tears,

And give you my last hug.

This is my last day wishing,

And my last day longing.

This is my final “goodbye.”

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-The Splintered Pencil